Ones that entertain, and ones that observe.

"There's only two types of people in the world: Ones that entertain and ones that observe." Oh, Britney. Sigh. So wise.

I know I know I know. I don’t want to hear it. When you get a post, you get a post, okay? I mean I could dictate this crap ALL day long – come to think of it – I do! But having the time (and energy) to sit down, write it, edit it (this “magic” doesn’t happen all by itself people) well that’s a different story. The day I have a secretary to translate my dictation, is the day you will have more blogging. That or this summer when I am not working (heeheeheehohoho – did I mention that I was now a teacher and get the summers OFF?! Holla at yo motha the glass if half full!). Anywho, the purpose of this is to simply share with you two new products that are rocking my world. I could no longer keep this information to myself, it just isn’t fair to you.

First off, eyelashes. You just have to try it. I pride-myself-am-embarrassed-by-haha-who-am-i-kidding-no-i-am-not-i-cant-live-without premium expensive mascara. It is one of those cosmetic products where I do believe price/name brand quality makes a difference. Believe me I have tried them ALL. There is literally not a one out there I can think of I haven’t. But I have found the best “cheap” drugstore brand mascara in the history of the universe. Seriously. The universe. Maybelline’s new Lash Stiletto Ultimate Length Washable Mascara. Eeeeek ugh-mazing. First of all, I am a sucker for packaging and its tres adorable. It looks like a stiletto heel for goodness sakes – genius! Marketing gurus must be inside my gullible head. But evenmoreso, it is such an impressively great mascara. Not since Maybelline discontinued their Illegal Lengths mascara in 2004 (devil! Please pause for a moment of silence) have I been so excited about any cheap mascara. Stilleto makes my lashes dead-of-night black and lengthens the freaking heck out of them - which yes are already decently long – but Stiletto takes them to like trannie level. You could be mistaken for a drag queen. But in a totally good way. Wait is there a good way? Hmmm ponder… anyway – it’s FAB. It will also give your lashes little volume and hold curl pretty well to make it an amazingly impressive combination of all four important aspects of mascara: length, darkness, volume and curl. And the best part? Its only, like, $7.50. Seven fiddy?! That rocks the kashbah. Go try it and its okay to write me a note to thank me. You’re very welcome.

Secondly, I have a renewed faith in this whole mineral makeup movement. Okay that’s a lie I am still not a believer and am so annoyed by the whole fad but I did find a new product I can not live without. MAC’s Mineralize Skinfinish Natural. It is the most amazing, silky smooth powder that goes on so nicely, covering just a little more than a powder but less than a foundation or even a powder/foundation – I just love it! I have normally steered away from MAC’s face products, not that they are bad they just usually aren’t my cup of tea (even cult-favorite Studio Fix is too heavy for me). However, after reading about this product I finally tried it and I am oh oh oh so glad I did. It looks so amazing over a little tinted moisturizer and it is a buildable product… which means you can change the look of it depending how much you want to wear - if you want more coverage, you can just keep adding layers of it. Oh yeah and of course it is “baked with minerals” in case you are one of those who are into that and have to have minerals. Puke. Anywho, I had even decided to invest in a fancy, nice kabuki brush to apply it with, but honestly Mineralize Skinfinish Natural is so good that with my random extra blush brush it looks fine. So simply put a little bronzer over it and your skin looks toner, silkier, smoother, and it tends to stay for a decent amount of time, I love it. I currently am using the “Medium” shade and although a steeper price than my aforementioned cheap mascara, that’s a wonderful trade off in my book.

That's all for now folks! I am off to teach future inmates of America's penal system important life lessons like how to find the probability of getting all "heads up" if you toss a coin four times. I know. Rock. Your. World. And in case you are a nerd and are now wondering... hmmm I wonder what is the probability of getting all "heads up" if you toss a coin for times. Its 1 out of 16. Nerd alert! Peace.